The Tools on the Altar, Elements. East Dagger Air West Cup Water South Wand Fire North Disk Earth Center Lamp Spirit

Ebony Anpu states, ''As the Wand is active and creative, so the dagger is active and divisive. The wand projects unity; the dagger cuts things in twain.''

This seems to relate to Sekhmet's 'Bright Flame' and Set's 'Black Flame, for He is also called 'cutter and isolater'.

Throughout my brief and spotty magickal career, I have not been attracted to the use of a dagger. YET, I so groove on the 'Set-energy'. It scares me not, It excites me, It . . .

BUT, and there is a big 'but', why has using a dagger scared me? Back in the early nineties, when Laura and I were doing the Wiccan thing, I shied away from using a dagger, holding a large quartz crystal point indeed.

SO, why does use of a dagger scare me? I read once about a phobia Lucille Ball had, in which she had to make sure all sharp knife edges were pointed away from her.

So I sought within myself for any clues.

The power to Cut, that potentially destructive power, what will I do with it? Cut myself? Some magicians seem to be drawn to it. I guess they are not the maladjusted 'cutters' which do it to as the pain of cutting themselves numbs them to a greater emotional pain.

What Potential there exists in the holding of a dagger which scares me? Can I trust myself to handle that power? Do I sense in myself the connection between it and Set's capacity as 'cutter and isolater'?

When it's time for 'Apep-slaying', I can feel the Set energy handing me the 'dagger' for my own illusion destruction. So what's different about a physical dagger?

When I was a wee child, my mother told of how I was fascinated with bits of broken glass. I clutched them in my hand tightly, not drawing a connection between the flowing blood their sharp edges were causing, and the shiny glittering attraction of the bits.

She told me she grew hysterical, ''Joan, Joan, drop that glass!''

A clue forms . . .

I 'hear' my mother saying, 'Joan, Joan, drop that dagger'? Yes, the coming to realization in my very young mind of danger, 'DANGER' is there.

But I am not a child of four anymore . . .

Regarding magical tools, I've had an epiphany on the dagger. Already, need for wand has called to me. It was curious. I started off as Queen Illuminaria, (remembered Divinity) thinking I should have something regal, like what crowned heads of state use. All I could find were wands for wedding Brides. Nah! From the pictures of items used by actual royalty, no, that wasn't it.

I thought maybe I should make my own. I felt an urge to go to the hardware store. I knew it by the feel, when I held it and swished it around, it was Mine. Thus, a simple thin 20 inch piece of copper tubing, with little caps at the end, is my wand. It didn't cost more than four bucks.

Same for my personal 'working pentacle', the one worn close to my heart. It didn't cost more than four bucks. Seeing copper pentacles sold at azuregreen.com intrigued me, and I sent for one. No pointdown, I made it point down by affixing a small silver key charm to the bale end. Humble, so humble to look at, it even turns me a little green!

(There's something about the wand and the pentacle being of copper that draws me, for copper is said to be a good conductor of electricity. Set as God of Thunder and Lightning means Set as God of Electricity.)

Then, while laying in bed in between dozings, I'm once again inspired to computer. I got an epiphany! I've been looking in the WRONG place for my dagger. (No other has felt right, the small one Laura got me back in 19something, nor those fancy ones azuregreen offers, some with Egyptian motifs even.

No, where I will find it is in the kitchen department of some nice store. THIS one I will not be afraid of, this one will feel right

J.C.Penney didn't have what I wanted. Last hope for the mall, and the day's adventure with the quest would be Sears. We were getting tired, and if not at that store, my search would have to be postponed until another day. I got to the kitchen department, which was only a tiny bit larger than the first one.

I saw the same black handled thing the first kitchen department had. I didn't need to touch it, to know it didn't excite me. Then I came upon the oddest thing, a collection of four steak knives, all of a cast piece in stainless steel. I liked that they were all of a piece. I wouldn't really know until I felt one in my hand, but it seemed that just carrying the package felt good.

It wasn't a huge financial investment, being just ten bucks for the set. Should this not work out, we could always use more knives!

Once out of the plastic casing, one of them felt good in my hand. The handle is designed to fit the shape of ones hand. I did not feel fearful holding it. It was NOT a frightening and foreign 'dagger', it was an instrument which in other guises, I have used to 'cut and isolate' all my life.

And I have three spares! Then I thought, I'll let all four be for the altar. I didn't want to confuse one for mundane usage with one for sacred purpose. Who knows, I may wish to hold one in each hand. And then all four together could symbolize throwing knives.

And there's the most curious thing. Remember when I shared with you the story of acquiring a piece with a gen-u-wine historically accurate picture of Set on it?

9 7/8 in. by 2 3/16in (25C by 5 1/2C)