"Starting Anew", "Keepsakes", "The End of An Era"
November 18, 1999
"Starting Anew"
"Starting Anew"
Some days you wake up and know you must start anew, put the past behind you, and look towards the future and what it holds, without regrets. This was such a day.Settling into this 'first day of the rest of my life' began with a long anticipated doctor's visit. I needed an official word for those achy joints, and what I could do about them. I learned much, which to perserve in a spot I can't lose, you'll find below.
There's no swelling or butterfly rashes, so rheumatoid arthritis or lupus is unlikely. In any case, the medicines for these varying types are identical - anti-inflammatories (Relafen, Aleve, Advil, Motrin, Aspirin, and their generic equivalents). I asked if Glucosamine/Chrondroitin was any good, fearing it was quack medicine. I hadn't seen any help from it. But apparently it has to be taken for eight weeks faithfully, though, to achieve results. I'd not given it that lengthy a test. Exercise is helpful, but only certain kinds. Swimming is good, as the water eases joint strain. But the water is too cold for that now. I've found bicycling too painful, whether regular or stationary type. So I've been walking on the treadmill for thirty minutes three or four times a week. It's done some good, but, ALAS, the treadmill is hard on the knees. An eliptical machine is better. Casa Grande Fitness has several of them, which I had tried a couple of times. They give one a sensation of climbing a mountain. No motor propells the user, however. I stood on it, waiting for something to move me, and nothing happened until I started working the pedals. But surprisingly, it didn't hurt my knees. Hand exercise, such as squeezing small rubber balls, is good. And, of course, the bad news: despite all our best efforts, the joints could get worse. I'm to return if there are any new symptoms.
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A visit to our doctor means a trip to Tucson. I took the camera 'just in case'. The southwestern Spanish influenced architecture is intriguing, and I did manage one passable shot.
Sight in Tucson
caught while turning the corner
close up revealing wall detailing...November 19, 1999
"Settling In"
After yesterday's busy day, it felt so good to stretch out and relax. The bed lured me early, before 8:00 o'clock. I took a blank sheet of paper and pen with me, just in case.
Settling In As I settle myself down to
the feel of
warm back stretching on
wide bed,
I settle into a cozy frame
of mind, too.
Taut muscles loosen
and drop
what was wearying me.
Comes soon,
dreamland.JAL,11-18-99 I'd no sooner scribbled the last line, when I shut my eyes and began to softly snore.
November 20, 1999
"Keepsakes"
There are many small treasures I like to keep near me, where I can see them often. Some I tack to the walls of my sewing room.
The wall I face when I sew... I've seen this wall more than frequently, so I'll share it with you all. You can have a closer look at some of those pictures. Starting with the far upper left picture, that's of Laura in the Flagstaff forest. The three little cherries were drawn by Laura. She made a drawing of the wolfpup, as well.Directly below the cherries is a scene at the Boyce Thompson Southwestern Arboretum. Below that, the stream at Montezuma's Well. To its left, another Arboretum scene. I didn't scan the picture of Julia to its left, but I used it as inspiration for a drawing of her. Heading right, Laura didn't like the way her chin looked in the picture of her and I, so I never scanned it. (But it's still one of my favorites.) The card above it has the logo "Growth has its own roadmap."Above that, Julia used her calligraphic arts on a sort of haiku I did.And I wouldn't forget that little white thing on the lower right of the wolf cub picture. It's a flower from the trim on Laura's Renaissance gown.
Beyond the window
Birds in tonal purity
Sing even if no one's listening.This is quite the day for remembrances. Inspired by another journaller who featured old letters from his father, I hunted through old cards to find sample handwriting of my parents. Finding my Dad's last letter may take some real hunting. I've looked through several drawers and big envelopes, and not found a scrap. I'd like to find a sample of Gramma's as well. I do hope I've saved SOME thing from them, no matter how scratchy. ~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~
At the time, I never gave those letters and cards much thought. Now they've passed on, and there's no replacing them.
But I did find some from the living. I scanned a showing excerpt of Aunt's June's delicately pressured handwriting, and her assurances that she thinks of me 'often'.
My mother's handwriting is even more revealing. I took an old Christmas card from her to the scanner, as well. You'll find it with a small photo of Mom. Just those few words show her full welcoming of Laura and Julia, and a bit of her flamboyant nature.
At least these treasures are safe.
November 21, 1999
"In My Book"
I woke up feeling further inspired by yesterday's endeavors. I'm going to ask Mom and Aunt June for handwriting samples of all my ancestors. I'm sure my Mother will have some, at least those of her parents. It would be cool if each picture in my photo album could be accompanied with a small piece of handwriting.
I love mementos, that's obvious. I collect them from wherever. It's not an uncommon habit. Often mementos or possessions of the famous fetch a high price. Fame draws not such a lure for me, unless it's of a person I really admire. There's another kind of memento collecting that has me totally baffled.
I don't often check in on the news these days. But today I was curious. I might find an odd bit. I wasn't disappointed. Remember, back in March of 1997, when the thirty-nine Heaven's Gate members sent themselves to never never land? They left their belongings behind, of course, and now those belongings have been put up for auction. Three hundred people attended, and spent $33,000 on the nineteen bunk beds, televisions, books, and other household items.
I'll never understand the lure of such things. We once had a blue truck, for cheap, that had been used by someone that committed suicide. The thing reeked of bad vibes. I was quite happy when we traded it in on a nice white car, free of icky vibes, and possessing an automatic shift.
Still, that unfortunate man was a 'nobody'. Had he been famous, it wouldn't have added to the truck's worth. But to some people, fame, for WHATEVER reason confers a glow to everything the famed person touches.
In my book, INFAMOUS doesn't quite cut it.
Okay, 'infamous' may be judgmental. I know they were thirty nine people 'desperately seeking meaning', and that's not an unhonorable goal. I've perserved the words of one of the disciples, who was "wanting something more and finding no satisfaction even in offbeat circles". It's a pity achieving that meant their own deaths. Still, it seems strange to be clamoring for their very ordinary possessions.
Where did I see these pomagranates? The four of us went to Boyce Thompson Southwestern Arboretum in hopes of seeing some fall color. The weather's been unusually warm, so not much transformation has occurred. Out And About In Arizona . . .
Pomagranates . . .
I captured what there was, though.
Tranquil Scene
Leaves Illuminated
November 22, 1999
"The End of An Era"
I'd just finished thirty five minutes of "Hill #5" on the 'mountain climber', and sat down at the table to read the paper while Laura finished her exercise. The Arizona Republic doesn't usually startle, but a small article, one paragraph long, in the back of the first section did.
Okay, he was ninety, these things happen. Maybe I startle easily. But it still seems like the passing of an era. Quentin Crisp, author of `The Naked Civil Servant,' dies at 90
The Associated Press writer describes him thusly:
That took a lot of guts back in 1928, when he first 'came out'.
Quentin Crisp
"A slight, dandified figure who wore makeup and high-heeled shoes, and piled his white hair in bouffant waves on top of his head, Crisp made no secret of the fact that he was gay."
Along with the picture I drew of him, I also explain why he's been one of my favorite authors.
His web site has more details. A resident of New York City, he was back in London to begin a one man touring show around the country. He probably should not have begun this massive endeavor at his age. His health was failing. Indeed, he felt reluctant, but obligated. He couldn't say no. His press agent and close friend thinks he should have. The day before the tour was to begin, he collapsed fatally. But even so, there was STYLE in the way he went. He lived to the round figure he'd hoped, and he made his exit in the country in which he made his entrance.
Besides writing books, he also appeared in a number of films including, most memorably, as Queen Elizabeth I in a big screen adaptation of Virginia Woolf's novel 'Orlando'. There couldn't have been a more perfect person for the role. The 'Queen' of England (and America) will not be forgotten.
November 23, 1999
"A Voice Heard Faintly"
It was 36 degrees (2 C) when we left for exercise. When we came back, the sky had lightened, but I could still see my breath. Thank humankind for indoor heating.
Later this day . . .
I sat down to rest with a mug of ice water, and after a few sips, my mind's ear heard this quiet voice. Someone might think I 'channeled' Quentin's spirit. Almost, even, a part of me wants to think that. At any rate, if he could speak, this is what I believe he'd tell me.
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QUENTIN CRISP 12-25-1908 to 11-21-1999
(A Voice Heard Faintly, Off-stage)
There's no light here.
I want to be back,
JAL, 11-23-99
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"Revamped"
The Buffy/Angel Crossover Special last night had us all riveted to our seats. Angel, by touch of a demon's blood, had been transformed back into a human. He was endearing, as he discovers he's hungry. He plants a chair in front of the refrigerator, and goes to town. Buffy's visiting from Sunnydale, and, oh, the joy at the impossible love now rendered possible.But you know, such joy can't last. The demons, whose blood had such powers, will destroy the world, or at least Buffy and Angel, with only her powers to fight them. So he must visit the Oracles, to regain his vampiric powers. The Oracles allow that the last twenty fours will be turned back in time. Buffy will remember none of it. Angel will.
When he returns home, and there is just enough time for a tearful goodbye. I'm crying right along with them. The twenty four hours are up, and they return to the earlier scene, in which Buffy asks him why didn't he let her see her when he was visiting in Sunnydale. They agree they must keep apart. I'm still crying, for Angel yet remembers their night of love. Just the subtlest hint of strain in his manner, but he gives her no clue.
The credits are still rolling. I'm still crying. Julia makes a fake sob scene, and utters a 'mournful' wail:
Angel's been REVAMPED!!!
Last year's Thanksgiving entry is worth another visit. May each of you have many things to be grateful for.NOTE OF AUGUST 2000: OF COURSE, THIS DAY'S SIGNIFICANT MENU IS PERSERVED, IT BEING A DAY OF TRADITIONAL PIGGERY!
6:00am - small plate with some stuffing and a little dark meat turkey
7:30am - big plate with lots of dark meat turkey, stuffing, delicious candied yams, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce ....
Yes, it's the LANSBERRY TRADITION - Thanksgiving breakfast! We like our meat at its juiciest and freshest. It's hard to judge when those turkeys are going to be done. Invariably, it's the morning.
2:30pm - one and a half huge pieces of pumpkin pie, loaded with cool whip
4:00pm - mug of 7-up - and two tiny green GAS-X pills
5:30pm - mug of 7-up - and two more tiny green GAS-X pills
7:30pm - mug of 7-up
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