May 19, 2004

"Stitching The Dreams"
9:21pm

Stitching The Dreams

It is always a good thing for me to see other artists' works, for I usually get inspired. Tonight I was looking at rather dreamlike and fanciful images, some of them quite detailed. My 'automatic drawings' are dreamlike, but not very detailed. They are rather doodlelike. I would like for some of them to have more detail, but I get a very specific feeling when I should quit drawing.

So when I get that feeling, I end the picture. Although my much more greatly detailed colored pictures show more realism and skill, there is something about the compositional quality of my automatic drawings which is superior. If I could combine the detailed finess with a pleasing movement through out the picture, I'd be on to some real improvement as an artist.

However, I'm happy with tonight's image, Stitching The Dreams. Obviously, my daytime activities have also inspired this image. Should anyone not know, 'Dual Duty', as I've labeled the spool of thread, is an actual brand. Its use may imply a sort of 'dual duty' at work here, as well.

It is also quite obvious that if you didn't know the gender of the artist who did the above picture, you would know a woman had done it. I wonder in how many other ways the subtle sign of my gender makes its way into my images? The artist tells many secrets about herself she does not yet know?

May 22, 2004

"Creative Critters"
6:44pm

Jet Propelled?

The above image of a distressed duck has been brought into being because someone on one of my forums said farting ducks weren't 'artistic'. I counter with "Maybe not artistic, but possibly comedic!" And so that small cartoon was born.

I've been all kinds of inspired lately, from silly to sublime. I finally got a gallery set aside for my 'automatic' drawings. And I created another new piece with which I'm greatly pleased.

This is me:

Bizzee Bee
Always Busy!

Julia drew the bee above in a contest for designing a public works mascot. As it was explained in the contest, policemen have their mascot, a dog called McGruff. So Yuma's public works should also have one.

And now they do! Julia's bee won. She explained the reasons why the bee is very suitable. The bee is busy in all sorts of productive ways. They serve in pollination of crops, and are natural engineers for they build their hexagonal hives. The honey they make is useful, as well. Our city's public works team are also busy in a beneficial way. As an amusing aside, when we see bees at work, we want to let them do their thing undisturbed, and so it is for those workers busy out on the streets and elsewhere.

Right now, they have over 250 concurrent projects going on, from those yet in the planning stages to those fully in implementation. It's quite a hive of activity.

The mascot now serves to educate the public. One of Julia's co-workers dressed up as a bee and went to one of the elementary schools to tell the kids about what the city's Public Works division does.

At Julia's workplace, they had an ice cream social to celebrate the new mascot, and she will be getting a 75$ check for her creativity.

Creative Critters, that's us!

May 23, 2004

"Dreaming of Seabreezes"
4:28am

I've woken up enough to record this dream:

Julia and I are in a strange restaurant on the beach. There is an outdoor patio, where patrons can sit and enjoy the wide expanse of blue ocean. I look at the dark wooden slats of the outer restaurant walls. Flowers grow in pots and window frame boxes. Gentle breezes are blowing. People are dressed in renaissance costumes. It is a lovely retreat, and I am enjoying the ambience. But the relaxation is disturbed by a great awareness of needing to pee. However, the only toilets I can find are in a large room, in the middle of it, very low to the ground. It is difficult to get down to one.

I sit there. Hotel/restaurant workers come and go, without paying attention to me seated so low. I particularily notice a dark haired waiter with longish black hair, black pants and white shirt who passes by. He pays no attention to me and my distressed efforts.

Is it the strange conditions? I can get no results. I look on the light minty green wall in front of me, A large corkboard had been nailed to the wall, and it and wall painted green afterwards. Dozens of scenic postcards have been pinned to the mint green corkboard. Some are beautiful, and I wonder where the people went to get those.

It is obvious they were sent by people on vacation for the workers to enjoy. What is this strange place on the beach? Why are the toilets so strange? Meanwhile, I cannot pee, and I very much need to. I don't want to abandon my efforts, so I just sit there.

And then I woke up, badly needing to pee.

9:28am

Hours afterwards, the dream of cool ocean breezes, and fragrant flowers everywhere still stays with me.

Flowers in San Diego...

May 29, 2004

"Seeking Seclusion"
9:25am

As I sat on the sofa, looking out at our two hummingbird feeders, I took several deep breaths, seeking the restful 'grounding'. As I took in the healthful air, I observed a tiny hummingbird first go to the vessel with the clear sugar water, and then to the vessel with the red sugar water, I was reminded of an old quote I'd entered in my journal a few years ago.

Using Google on our site, I was able to find it, as well as a previous occurrence of a state with which I am today acutely familiar. I'd lamented, that day of February 1999 that, "I feel hungry for so many things, but it is not food. I need to learn what is missing within me. I cry, needing something. What?"

Further, I declared, "Oh to find the wide open spaces within myself. I feel so crowded in. What is all this stuff? I must release it. The housekeeping of the soul awaits."

I feel like that again. I am dry of inspiration. I grow frustrated. A project languishes because I feel empty. I stare at the blank screen, and nothing comes up from Deep Self. Nothing but these words, "Return to the Center". There within the solitude of myself will I find the grounding I need.

As I took deep breaths, and observed the bird, I remembered the nectar seeking being, gathering his delights in solitude:

As a bee seeks nectar From all kinds of flowers, Seek teachings everywhere, Like a deer that finds A quiet place to graze, Seek Seclusion to digest All you have gathered. . . Mamkhai Norbu Rinpoche, quoting Dzogchen Tantra from his book The Crystal and the Way of Light

I can seek 'the teachings', but they must be brought into myself, away from the loud clamor of the outside world. Only in seclusion can they be properly digested. Only there within the solitude of myself will I find the grounding I need.

So I breathe deeply, seeking the deep roots. Inspiration will come in time.